Nov 19, 2012

DIY Gift #1

So broke.  Must....make....gifts...cheap.  I saw this tutorial on pinterest from a cute blog Nestled and thought it looked cute.  That is my awesome modeling picture.  Yeah.....   I might make some more for xmas gifts, it was really easy once I stared at the ribbon, washers and tutorial for like 30 minutes.  I hope to make some more gifts.  It's pretty tough being crafty, or copy-crafty.  I have the attention span of a tick right now.  Must...suck.....it....up....and....be....cheap.

Oct 30, 2012

Band of Horses: "Slow, Cruel Hands Of Time," Live on Soundcheck

Old Married Couple

I spend so much time with Serena, my 2 year old, that I often feel like an old married couple.
Tonight she said "mommy, snuggle with me in bed", then she proceeded to shower me with kisses and hugs and I was really into it...
then she said "O.K., get off now".

Sep 10, 2012

stupidity

My 2 year old got into the bag with all the Easter eggs and they still had jelly beans in them.  Since she is not allowed to eat jellybeans or anything with sugar, I started to panic and shove them in my mouth by the handful.  We were having a jelly bean eating race, And I was super concerned with having to deal with her after she ingested all of those jelly beans.  After eating 100 myself, I decided that a better idea would be to stop shoving them in my mouth, and put them in a bag in the cupboard.


Sep 4, 2012

Morality...Princess Style

I was thinking about all the princess books I read Serena and how the lessons can be pretty harsh...harsh but funny...in that, we tell our 2 year olds this shit.  Here is what I have learned and am teaching my daughter.

Cinderella: Clean your room, have many animal friends, be nice, and you will go to a party and meet a dude and he will find your shoe and marry you.

Ariel:  Get over your obsession with being someone you are not, or you will never talk again.  Just kidding, your daddy will fix it.

Brave:  Don't like the dudes your parents picked out?  Beat them up, put a spell on your mom and fight your dad with a sword.  Then you will end up alone and happy.

Tangled: Cut off your hair.

Belle: Read books and you will be smart, marry a hairy man...he is hot under that fur.

Tiana:  Save money your whole life and you will still need a miracle to make shit happen.

Snow White:  Are 7 little men better than 1big one?  Apparently.

Sleeping Beauty:  Touch something you are not supposed to and everyone will get a nice long nap.

Aug 26, 2012

Magazine Inspirations

I was just speaking to someone the other day about how as we age, our magazine subscriptions change.  In my teens it was Seventeen, Self, National Geographic...in my 20's it was People, Newsweek, Lucky...now that I am 30, I subscribe to Parents, Better Homes and Gardens...etc.
Better Homes and Gardens is just my speed right now.  Since we are new homeowners, I really enjoy the decorating tips, the gardening advice and of course, the recipes.
Are magazines becoming a lost art form?  I feel like I have always loved reading magazines.  I love books too, but sometimes you just want something light.  It's great to just chill with a magazine.  I love short blurbs of inspiration.  I just told Alex that I want to make one of our walls in the kitchen or dining room a magnetic/chalkboard wall...not for Serena, but for me.  I think it would be cool to put up recipes and articles up on the wall, to have a place to go for home inspiration.
sort of like this

...or like this...only better


The problem is, that I want it now.  Alex won't let me do any fun decorating until all of the non-fun stuff is done, like the A/C unit and flooring etc.

Anyway, the point of this post was to share some of the cool tips I read in this months BHG issue.
Here they are, I am spreading the wealth:

1.  Keep icebox cookie dough in your freezer to make homemade treats quickly. 
2.  If painting something a bright color, use gray primer.
3.  To dress up place settings, use mini bouquets of branches from your yard tied with ribbon.
4.  You can make a shitty fitting sweater look good... if you're Heidi Klum
5.  Beauty tips: Use mascara on the inner lashes only to open up your eyes and make them rounder, use coconut oil on damaged hair: warm it, comb it into damp hair, after 15 minutes shampoo and condition it out.
6.  Idiot beauty tip:  For natural waves, curl your hair and use hairspray...no shit! LMAO.
7.  Grapes are freshest this month.  Store them in a covered container (I don't), but I will now.
8.  Eat chocolate, of course a women's magazine will tell you this.

Aug 25, 2012

Oblivious

So, I picked up this ABC book from the library, and I didn't realize what it was about.
We got home and I started to read it, and it took me like 4 pages to realize it was about being gay.
I was confused by the use of "moms" and "dads" as plural.
I looked over the cover again and started to laugh because I realized how obvious it was. 
Upon closer examination, I thought this might be pretty insulting.
I know I would be offended by the way they chose to depict these couples. 
It's pretty stereotypical in a bad way.
Check it out.





Aug 23, 2012

Potty bloopers

My 2 year old just ran into her bathroom and said "Give me some space!"
I said, "what?"
She said, "Give me some privacy."
Nice.


Aug 17, 2012

Nostalgia

Back home,
The street i grew up on.
Back with my daughter.
Sleeping in my great grandparents bed.
Pictures of generations.
Peace.





Aug 3, 2012

Summa Summa Summa Time!

My mom is constantly buying me groupons for photo books, most of the sites are a royal pain in the butt.  Finally she got me one for Shutterfly, which I had already been working on a summer photo book for Serena.  They have the easiest and coolest formats.  Hands down the best.



Click here to view this photo book larger
Shutterfly photo books are the new way to preserve your memories. Create your own today.



Aug 1, 2012

Mobile again

Awhile back, I had a great phone that I could upload to blogger. Then it broke, and I got a crappy phone.  Then my mommy bought me a new awesome phone. Now, not only can I upload pics from my phone, but I can also speak the text like right now.  Although, I seem to speak like a computer...com...pu...ter... So, I am up and running!  Look forward to annoying useless information.  Like this horrible picture of my morning coffee.


Jul 25, 2012

On Health

It's been a long time since I have had a really productive day, where I am fully aware and awake.  For awhile now, I have been thinking that I have a vitamin deficiency.  I can go about a half of a day feeling good, but there is always a time of any day, that I just want to crash.  I am sure if I saw a doctor or nutritionist, they would tell me about 100 things that I am doing wrong...coffee all morning, not enough water, too many sweets, not enough exercise.  I just want a quick fix,  I don't want to change my lifestyle...do I have to?  Ugh.
My best friend is a Holistic Heath Coach, ironic, yes.  She is amazing though, she helps people change their habits and become healthy.  What a lady.  Here is her website Daily Bliss Wellness, she does a free consultation too.  I love that she is taking this path in life, it has great benefits for me.  She gives free teleclasses, I just participated in one and I learned so much, not just about smoothies, but about my body and great things to put in it.  She has a blog and newsletter too.
secret fruit and veggies for kids

delicious smoothie
Anyway, I think we all KNOW what we are doing wrong, it's really about changing those bad habits.  I am going to start by implementing a smoothie in my day, for energy and replenishment...and I am going to try to make healthier choices.  I love that a free teleclass can inspire you.  I think we all just need a little inspiration now and then.  Thanks Christina!

Jul 9, 2012

Tortured artist

my crazy potty trainer
Yesterday my 2 year old was coloring a picture.
  I was Skyping with my mom and grandma and my grandma said
 "color a picture for Gammy and send it to me so I can put it on my wall!".
So after we got off Skype, I ripped a page out of her Pooh Bear coloring book and then said
"let's color for Gammy!"
She took the red marker and slashed the page like a serial killer, then took the black marker and defiled Pooh's face until it was unrecognizable.
Then later I said "Let's put it into and envelope and mail it to Gammy!"
She then climbed onto the coffee table (she was naked from the waist down due to potty training) and she started to tear it up with her vagina, which she calls "gina".
 Alex and I were cracking up.
She was rip/crawl/humping it.
She is such a tortured artist... or she has no respect for art.

Jun 22, 2012

Evolution of a Nap

My 2 year old is killing me.
She is in her room right now screaming that she is stuck in her laundry.  Should I let her out?
*Intermission*
Ok I'm back.
Let's see...it's 3pm now, we started before 1pm.
She was in there trying to be a one-man band.  I heard her guitar and keyboard playing simultaneously.
She came out.
She had a poopy diaper.
I changed it and came back out.
Then she was singing happy birthday to each one of the Pooh characters.
She came out.
She had a poopy diaper.
I changed it and came back out.
Then all was quiet until about 30 minutes ago.  I then smelled the Desitin factory through the draft in the doorway.  This can't be good.
I go in.
She has literally taken a brand new tube of Desitin and smeared it all over her legs, hands, arms, pants, shirt, the carpet in various places, her library books and the door.
I am dumbfounded.
I strip her to her diaper and make her lay down in bed while I clean it up.
She is laughing at me.
I do my best to clean it up, the carpet is done for.
I leave again.
Now we are where this post began.  She screams that her fingers are stuck in the laundry.
I go in.
She is naked.  Her diaper is in the laundry basket.
I change her diaper and while I am, she says "sing me a song" I say "what about a song about a little girl who was very bad and pissed off her mommy and ruined the carpet and wouldn't take a nap and is in big trouble...what about that...does that sound like a good song?"
She says "yes".
She is laughing at me.
At this point I am writing this and ignoring her.  I took out all the creams, so the only thing she could be into in there is her wipes, that's easy to clean.  I hear her playing with toys.
...in happier times
I told her that she can stay in there all day.  Fine by me.
...to be continued...

Jun 14, 2012

If You Like Hymns....

....or Pina Coladas.  :)
I recorded this just now for my CRHP sisters (we are learning it next Monday and I am going out of town tonight).  I posted it on my Catholic blog, but I thought I would share it on here too.  It's really bad.  I haven't played in awhile and I just learned it.  Feel free to rip me up.

Jun 13, 2012

Rough Days and Funny Slurs

I know I have it way better than other moms out there, I only have one child for instance.  I know I should not be whining about my life, I have it pretty good, at least I don't have to deal with anyone other than my own offspring.  Yesterday was a bad day.  I hate to say that, it's so whiney.  Serena was being a "terrible two" and I was being a "moody bitch".  I had a glass of wine and since that was the last of the wine, I had a dirty martini...in my wine glass.  Basically I skipped the shaker and martini glass and just poured a random amount of vodka, olive juice and vermouth into my wine glass...which I later shattered by accidentally smashing it into the sink fixture...I have depth perception issues.  Need I say that my mood was turned around?  I was lost in my buzz and I needed it.  
The real reason I wanted to write this post is because I had something funny to say that is too long for a facebook status update.  
Today Serena and I were sitting on the couch and I said "I am the captain of this ship!"
...and she replied "I am the captain dip shit!"
I guess that's not too long for a status update but I like this picture so I'm sticking to it.
Hahahahahahahahaha.
why did I not have one of these?  I would have broke it.
That's all.

May 29, 2012

Bigger Bathroom

Having a bigger bathroom is awesome.  Not only do I have an amazingly huge bath/shower with a rounded hotel shower rod (we installed), but I have room to do things to myself.  I have been wanting to get out my curlers for the last almost 2 years, since we have been in the apartment with zero counter space.  So I did it!  I am so excited I finally got to play with my hair.  My mommy (hair stylist) would be proud.
Yippeee!  Pretty hair, fast!

May 20, 2012

TMI Alert

The only bumpin' and grindin' going on in this house is the furniture and the tools.


Moving is hard on a sex life.  The lack of "making love" is probably what is making us want to kill each other.  No...time...to...do....it...

May 14, 2012

Money Pit


Remember the 80's movie "The Money Pit?  That is my life right now.  We knew it would be a lot of work though.  I was going to post pics to show the shit we are knee deep in, but alas, I do not need your pity.  I pity myself enough.  We need a miracle to get this place ready by wednesday.  Really we need like 25 more people.  This has been pretty interesting to say the least, a real eye-opening learning experience.
Must...keep...head...in...game...

May 9, 2012

I got an award!

I know pride is a deadly sin, but I can't help it!  I was on cloud 9 on Friday night at the JLT annual dinner, when I was surprised with this awesome achievement.  So cool.  I was really not expecting it.  I was telling some people the other night, that I thought my award days were over, now that all I do is stay home.  I am so happy to be a member of the Junior League because they are such a huge and positive presence in the Tallahassee community.  I was honored to spend my first year here in Tallahassee, working with the JLT on community projects that make a difference.  Now the pressure is on to be a badass this coming year.  I am amped up for the 2012/2013 league year, helping others and making even more connections with the amazing women that make up the JLT.
Cheers!

May 8, 2012

New Home

Word up.
We are finally closing on our house, hopefully, this Thursday.  This whole process has been plagued, as most home buying endeavors are.  Ugh.  I pretty much removed myself from the process because it was stressing me out.  The cool thing is, Alex is starting a DIY home improvement blog, I am so proud of him for following in my footsteps.  The nugget is waking up, better go.
Have a happy tuesday!

Apr 24, 2012

Wedding, Graduation and Disney

It was a fun-filled weekend, we went to Orlando for my brother's graduation from MMI, my best friend's wedding and Serena's first trip to Disney.  It was a magical, happy and loving weekend.  Here are some of my fav pics.
MOH and Bride

sushi at Amura

ladies hitting up the hotel bar

some random guys picking me up (lol, friends)

first trip to disney!

my cute little family

first ride...Pooh!

gotta ride the tea cups

show face

intermission

motorcycle babes at MMI

my brother...so proud

Uncie Woy

my family...xoxo

downtown Orlando, Church St.

bride and groom

Ceviche

margaritas downtown

the wedding morning

sexy robes

sexy girls in sexy robes

the dress

the face

walking down the aisle

the vows

hubby, me, mommy

me, mommy, bubba

party like it's 1999

friends

breaking it down

more breakdown